#501
<Inside EAT>
Date: 09/07/2001
From: Lita_n_Spidey
<Lita and Evil Mike are looking over some naughty pictures, and discussing the benefits and drawbacks of maybe having some of them blown up, when Michelle comes to the table.>
Michelle: So. Do either of you want anything?
Evil Mike: Say, young lady, have you ever wanted to go to California?
Michelle: Oh! I'd love to go to California! I want to be a dancer!
Evil Mike: Well, as it turns out, Lita and I live in California.
Michelle: You do? Why, that's wonderful! Will you take me there?
Evil Mike: No. Now go get me some candy bars.
<Michelle heads over to the counter, on the verge of tears.>
Lita: Evil Mike, that wasn't nice.
Evil Mike: Nope. It sure wasn't. Now, how about this one? Good lighting, lots of Ass.
Lita: No, no, no! I like this other one better.
Evil Mike: But you can barely see Ass! Well... except for mine...
Lita: Yeah. That's the point.
<Just then, Critter comes in and sees Michelle crying.>
Critter: Forsooth! Who hath made thee cry fair maiden?
Michelle: <crying, points to Evil Mike>
Critter: Thou art a jerk! I art a pacifist, but forsooth, I must punish thee!
<Critter starts swinging his guitar around, ready to smash EM's head in>
Lita: I think it just might be time to go.
<Lita and Evil Mike jump up from their table. Evil Mike grabs the Hershey Bars from Michelle, and he and Lita bolt out the door. They get back into Spidey.>
Lita: Hey, look over there! Looks like Rimmer and Toblerone are still getting along pretty well!
Evil Mike: *snicker*
<They start off once again, throwing flaming Pop-Tarts at the other racers>
Lita: Eat Strawberry-Filled Frosting and Sprinkle covered Death! Bwa ha ha!
#502
{Grabs a flaming Pop Tart}
Date: 09/07/2001
From: B_O_G_Laserblast_Van
Yum! Cinnamon, My favorite!
#503
/a hires Torgo as the cook for EAT...
Date: 09/07/2001
From: Schmoe_Don_Baker
Haha! Now, everyone who orders will have to wait an excruciatingly long time as Torgo tries to reach for the pots and pans on the high shelf!!
And while they're waiting, I'm putting miles behind me!!!
Whoohoo!!
The MaStEr will be pleased!!!
#504
I'm back and magically out the window!
Date: 09/07/2001
From: Gramps_Prune_Buggy
Don't ask me how: it's been a heck of a busy week, and it's been a heck of a slow-loading week for the board! (Also, I didn't read many other replies, so forgive me for breaking off of any storyline ;o) )
<in that drinking redneck southern voice> Hey ya'll, mind if I hit ya'll with a bigol' dose of southern charm? First, I'll give Lita a bigol' heapin' helpin' of fine southern cuisine! <gramps covers Spidey in chitlins> HEEEEEEEEEEEEEERE PIGGYPIGGYPIGGY!! SOOOOOOOOEEEEEEEEY!!! Wait, but the piggy's dead! Hawt Dawg!!!
And now, I'm thinkin' Mr. Don Baker would be much abliged if I taught him how to hunt for some cattle to make his own hamburgers! First of all, you have to have a car window to hunt from, of course! <gramps takes the Angel Van's window and throws it at Schmoester> Of course, you have to provide your own car door, providing that you find yourself a car, mind you!
And to that fake hillbilly, Mister "I'm Big And Important, But No One Can Spell My Name, Seeing As My Name Is Sutenhotep, And Not Jeb Or John Boy" Mobius, he receives mountain oysters, disguised as those ol' oversized Chikin' McNuggets them city slickers eat! Of course, they're really bull testicles, but he won't know! <throws the mysterious box of food through the rig's window>
YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAW!!!!!!!!!! I gonna win to-nite!!! <Raisin sings Dixie>
grandmapa!
4:50 P.M. CST!
o/Well the ICC is a checkin' on down the line,
I'm a little overweight and my log books are way behind,
but nothin' bothers me tonight,
I can dodge all the scales all right,
six days on the road and I'm gonna make it home tonight/o
#505
Huh?
Date: 09/07/2001
From: RimseysDeadlyBeeCar
I've been hiding those evil clowns in my car the whole time but a mime stops me cold in my tracks? I don't get it but I suppose I'll jive with it for the sake of the Wacky Race.
<Rimmi kicks Toblerone is his happysack and hikes it the Hell back into her car. She catches up to every one and runs other cars off the road. Mrs. Hargrove sprays bee juice all over the other cars and the Deadly Bees are sent out to destroy the other racers!!!!11111!!!!>
#506
Hey Rimmer......
Date: 09/07/2001
From: B_O_G_Laserblast_Van
....my Lucinda clones are kicking the crap out of your Pennywise clowns!
#507
/a throws a donut pillow at Grampy...
Date: 09/07/2001
From: Schmoe_Don_Baker
Awww! Poor little fella, your hinder must be smarting something fierce!!
Take a load off, dude.
#508
Yeehaw!!! I got me a pillow!!!
Date: 09/07/2001
From: Gramps_Prune_Buggy
Now I can rest my weary ol' butt! Thanks, Schmoe_Don! You ain't such a bad feller after all! I think we should be buddys! You know, we can go out cow tippin' and chuggin' moonshine and clippin' Aunt Eulabell's toenails! Sounds like a good ol' time to me!
You know, I'm gonna take another gander at this thar pillow I'm sittin' on! <gramps takes pillow out from under his rear, and finds a big ketchup smiley face stain on it, signed "Schmoe wuz here... or rear!"> Now hang on a second, partner! What you trying to pull here, drawing a smiley face on my toush, then giving me a pillow like you a good ol' boy? Well, buddy, I got somethin' for you! <throws empty moonshine jug at car>
((((THUNK!)))) That one put a big ol' dent in that big ol' city slickin' Caddylac of yours! See ya at the finish line, buddy! VROOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!
grandmapa!
8:00 P.M. CST!
#509
<Whistle Blows> Coffee Break!!!
Date: 09/07/2001
From: Lita_n_Spidey
<Everybody gets out of their vehicles, and shake off their various injuries. They all start recreating in various ways. Evil Mike plays chutes and ladders with grandmapa. Rimmer and Band_Of_Gypsies eat ice cream cones, and discuss the music scene. All the various clowns and clones frolic and play freeze-tag in a nearby field. Spidey knits a lovely spider-silk turtleneck for PM who looks on approvingly. Wurwolf and Cavewoman thumb wrestle. Ortega is serving food to everybody. Dumbschmoe reads naughty Star-trek fanfics to Mickey, h-wood, and TDO. Toblerone is playing pinball. (Why wouldn't there be a pinball machine by the track?) Everybody I missed is in line for the food Ortega is serving. There isn't any coffee anywhere, but nobody really seems to notice. Lita is talking to Steffi.>
Lita: So. You're an anteater now?
Steffi: Apparently. I'm not sure how that happened. This whole race is so confusing.
Lita: Well, I was an anteater not too long ago. As soon as somebody finds your real body, you can go right back into it. It's easy. You can even go into somebody else's body, if you want. I was Betty White for about five minutes.
Steffi: Really? Can I have your body?
Lita: Er... No.
Steffi: Oh. Well... I like mine better anyway.
Lita: Hmph.
Steffi: I bet TDO will find my body for me. *sigh*
Lita: You're really into him, huh?
Steffi: Yeah! He assaulted me, and now we're engaged!
Lita: Is that a fact?
Steffi: Well, how do you think I would feel, when a man breaks into my home, kills half my family, and then kidnaps me against my will, causing me to be horribly injured in his big stupid race, and eventually turned into an anteater?
Lita: Blinded with rage?
Steffi: No.
Lita: Frozen with terror?
Steffi: No. Try again.
Lita: Head over heels in love?
Steffi: Bingo!
Lita: You're insane.
Steffi: Insane with love?
Lita: No.
<The whistle blows again.>
Lita: Oh, coffee break's over. Nice talking to you.
Steffi: Sure.
<Everybody goes back to what they were doing before the break. TDO goes back into whatever time warp he was in, Schmoe goes back to throwing things at people and obsessing about Carrot Top, the clowns and clones stop playing tag and go back to maiming each other. PM tucks away his new turtleneck, and goes back to wrangling his sidekicks, Rimmer goes back to setting deadly bees on other racers. Toblerone goes back to looking for love, and grandmapa goes back to being *waaay* redneckier than his Hobgoblins inspired vehicle would have prepared us for. Lita and Evil Mike go back to scraping soul food off of Spidey. Everybody else goes back to whatever everybody else was doing (sorry, but it's all really confusing, and I can't keep track of it all) even to the point of re-injuring themselves, to maintain continuity. Things go on exactly the way they were before. Lita and Evil Mike eventually finish cleaning up Spidey jump in, and get back on the road.>
#510
o/~ Go to sleep little Rimmi..... o/~
Date: 09/07/2001
From: RimseysDeadlyBeeCar
I hate to leave like this and miss the end of the race but Rimmi is super duper tired. She's had a long day and if she stays up any longer she'll regret it in the morning.
I wish all the racers good luck and I'll be by in the morning to see who won. (Gosh, I sure hope the winner isn't someone saying "Blah!". That would destroy my life.) And make sure the winner gets this: ~~~(((8:><:8)))~~~
If it works it should like two rats kissing. Yes, I'll give you kissing rats.
Goodspeed, brave travelers and good night!
<Rimmi sets off to bed but not before coating the track ahead with honey. Have fun!>
#511
{B_O_G drives into the honey}
Date: 09/07/2001
From: B_O_G_Laserblast_Van
{B_O_G's van slides off the road & crashes}
#512
Poor BOG. Here, let me give you a hand..
Date: 09/07/2001
From: Schmoe_Don_Baker
Psych!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Later!! Eat my leftovers!! Oh wait, I never have any leftovers!! Sucka!!!!
#513
Thank you, please drive around
Date: 09/07/2001
From: h_wood
<h_wood chuckles as he spies the other racers still at EAT as he drives away...>
Okay, it's go time now people- good luck & good racing!
h_wood
Warrior of EAT
"Warrior of the lo-ost world, is better than the finder of the lo-ost loves..."
#514
/a throws Beanie Babies across the road.
Date: 09/07/2001
From: Schmoe_Don_Baker
Haha! No one can resist collecting these stuffed little distractions! Whoohoo!
Be the first on your block to own Floopy Doopy the Dolphin and Fartknocker the Bear and Kangadoodle the Giraffe and SnipDippityDoo the Snail!!
Wheeeee!! While everyone's busy picking up the cute little buggers, I'll be on my way to the finish line!!
Eat huggable lovable squeezable death!!!
#515
(SCRRREEEECH) WHAT???
Date: 09/07/2001
From: ArmoredMickey
You're Steffi the babysitter? Wait a minute, what're you doing with...Oh, crap. This better not be a trap sent by TDO, because I swear if it is, I'll barbecue your ass so fast and give you to Schmoe.
Steffi: I was a trap, but not now. While you walked me last night, TDO was supposed to do something to the Big Misunderstood Se...screw it, the car, but he never showed up.
Mickey: You know what? He probably wants you to stay an anteater. He says he loves you, and...POW...you're an anteater. We men are all alike. (Sees Ortega walking around the race route, confused) GET BACK IN YOUR DAMN MOVIE, TEGGY!!!
Steffi: You know, I can be freed....with a kiss.
Mickey: Um, no. I don't kiss damn dirty anteaters.
(to be continued)
#516
Um..... did someone mention food?
Date: 09/07/2001
From: AngelsVanODeath
I got sideswiped by a carload of rabbis, but I'm back in the race! A full 40 minutes before midnight, too!
Um..... eat death, everyone! Okay?
#517
Oof! No mas! No more death, please.
Date: 09/07/2001
From: Schmoe_Don_Baker
I'm full!!
Besides, that death is so fattening. I'm gonna need a week on the stairmaster after this bounty of death.
#518
Gawsh, I gotter think of somethin'!
Date: 09/07/2001
From: Gramps_Prune_Buggy
That Liter girl scraped all them good pig parts off her giant bug! And the finersh line is up ahead! I imagern I bettur pull out the ol' walker! Oh Liter, this here spell is gonna be a true gift to Southern charm! <gramps waves his magical walker and instantly, tight jeans and Dolly Pardon impersonators are smothering Lita and EM on the inside of Spidey>
That be some hawt stuff! Yeeeeeehaaaaaaw... Look at all this animals and honey coatin' the track! It's a good thing Raisin has these there non-stickable tires, built for them sticky prunes! And now Schmoe gonna geet it! <gramps is smart enough to use his magical walker to give Schmoe a perm, leave it in too long, cause a fire, and cause an even bigger grease fire from all those bacon stains on Schmoe's shirt>
Yeeeeeeehaaaaaaaaaw!!!! Watch out wolfie! I gonna beat ya!
grandmapa!, sch.
10:40 P.M. CST!
#519
I wanna win!
Date: 09/07/2001
From: AngelsVanODeath
I've hardly played but that doesn't matter! I deserve to win! Waaaaaah!
<flattens one of Grampy's tires, just for grins>
#520
Clear sailing to the finish line
Date: 09/07/2001
From: ArmoredMickey
What was that, Steffi? I don't care...you go on the paper!!!!
(Will Mickey win the race? Will Steffi ever be human again? Will Lita get naked again? Where is Waldo? Will TDO screw things up? Tune in to the exciting conclusion of the Wacky races to find out these answers)
#521
hmmph! I don't want a perm!!
Date: 09/07/2001
From: Schmoe_Don_Baker
I can't be the cool sexy love machine that all the hookers and dope fiends go after with a perm! I'm the original LLCoolJ! Cause ladies love the cool Joe Don!!
I'll match your Dolly Parton impersonators with my own Charo impersonators!! Coochie coochie to you, old timer!!
With special guest star: Death!!!!!
#522
<Pushes the Dolly impersonators to the
Date: 09/07/2001
From: Lita_n_Spidey
back.>
You girls can all sit on top of the shoes. I'm gonna have to put on the speed now. The bboard is going so slow, it might take me 10 minutes to get this posted!
VVVRRRRROOOOOMMMMMM!
#523
Ahhhh!!! I be slidin'!!!
Date: 09/07/2001
From: Gramps_Prune_Buggy
I'll geet you for this, wolfie! <waves the walker and gives wolfie another flaming perm>
Old coots rock! Especially when they be wobbling 'cross the feenish line!
grandmapa!
10:54 P.M. CST!
#524
It's all about ME!!!
Date: 09/07/2001
From: AngelsVanODeath
I insist on winning! WhoohooO!!!!!!!! I have a chance, you all can just eat my dust! (again)
#525
<drinks a can of Cough-fee to run...
Date: 09/07/2001
From: Gramps_Prune_Buggy
on his two broken hips> Woo-hoo! I be movin' and groovin' paw!
gramps!
10:57 P.M. CST!
#526
Vroom vroom vroom!
Date: 09/08/2001
From: Lita_n_Spidey
I'm gonna win!
#527
Drivin Down Highway 40 In my big ol'
Date: 09/08/2001
From: h_wood
Megaweapon.
Put your socks on momma now...
h_wood
Warrior of EAT
"No one knows what caused the explosion that claimed the life of our beloved Megaweapon."
#528
Steffi: I'm pregnant
Date: 09/08/2001
From: ArmoredMickey
Mickey: WHAT?
Steffi: I'm kidding.
Mickey: Phew!!! Hey look , there's Waldo!!! Did I win? Well, huh?????
#529
<gramps wets his diaper>
Date: 09/08/2001
From: Gramps_Prune_Buggy
Awww, poo! My urinal tract just recovered from all that Cough-Fee!
gramps!
#530
Where am I?
Date: 09/08/2001
From: Lita_n_Spidey
Did I win? Are we there yet? Should I still be driving? Hold on EM!
VVVVVVRRRRROOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hey, wait! I did win! YAAAAAAAAAAAAY!
<Evil Mike gets a great big hug. Well, I guess "hug" would be the polite way to put it.>
I am the champion!
(It is the first person on the 8th, right? RIGHT?)
#531
Lita, you won!!!! WHOOOOOO!!!!!
Date: 09/08/2001
From: wurwolf
Cool beans, Lita, you won the coveted Forrester Cup! Good show, girl!!! You and Spidey should head on into the winner's circle!! YEAH!!!!!! Another bitchin' Wacky Race!!! //thumb
wurwolf
Bonhead #3
fs!!
#532
Cavey and Pumy hack over the finish line
Date: 09/08/2001
From: Caveys_sidehacker
Stick out your butt, baby!!!! Whooooooo!! We made it!! We didn't win but we made it across!
Cavey and Pumy do it again!!
#533
Yay for Lita and Spidey!!!1
Date: 09/08/2001
From: Schmoe_Don_Baker
You win the coveted Forrester Cup, Lita!!
Oh great, I smell another title for Lita in her growing list of taglines! HMMPH!!
But congratulations and stuff!!
#534
LITA!!!!
Date: 09/08/2001
From: MickeyTheGardener
Congrats, you won a damn fine race. A toast in your honor!!!
Mickey (but I came in third and fixed the space time continuim and found Waldo!!!)
#535
Wow! Congrats Lita!!!
Date: 09/08/2001
From: h_wood
Holeee Crap, that was fun. Man Lita, we must've been posting within seconds of each other! Anyway, Thanks everyone for a great race, esp. Lita, without whose assistance I'd still be back at the starting gate. :)
Everyone, back to EAT for drinks on me!
h_wood
Warrior of...Awww Fergetit.
"They misspelled perimeter."
#536
<whining> Whhhhhhhy!!!
Date: 09/08/2001
From: Gramps_Prune_Buggy
Smelly_Mel won because of her last post on the 24th! Hmmph! <tear>
gramps!
#537
Yay for ME!!!
Date: 09/08/2001
From: Lita_n_Spidey
Do I get a party? I wanna party! I wanna party!
I also want to let all these Dolly Parton impersonators out of the car. I think they're ready to party too.
Congratulations, Me! Great race, everybody else! Now steer me to the punch bowl!
Woooo!
Lita
President of the I Hate Riddler Club
Vice-Prez of the I Hate Hamburglar Club
Queen Bitch
Holder of the Coveted Forrester Cup
#538
Aww! Sorry, Grandmapa!
Date: 09/08/2001
From: Schmoe_n_wurwolf
But new race, new rules and all that. There there, second place is still good too! You're still money! You're so money and you don't even know it, man.
You're still the bee's knees, dude! There there, little guy.
And congratulates, Lita!
fw!!
fs!!
#539
The new date...
Date: 09/08/2001
From: Schmoe_n_wurwolf
Winning on the new date is much more analogous to crossing the finish line. You know, breaking the plane, I think is the technical term for it.
It's the agony of defeat for you, Grampy!! And the thrill of victory for Lita!!
But still and all though, everyone ran a great race! Thanks very much, nice people!!
fs!!
fw!!
#540
Oh well! CONGRATS LITA!!!
Date: 09/08/2001
From: grandmapa
<><>hugs<><> You deserve it after all this time!!! <runs over and spikes the punch with prunes> Diarrhea, anyone?
Heh-heh!!!
magrandpa?
grandmapa!, sch.
The Elderly Gender-Bender!
Vice-Prez of the I Hate Riddler Club!
President of the I Hate Hamburglar Club!
Wacky Races 2001 Second Place Winner!
11:35 P.M. CST!
#541
okay...Lita won... Now what?
Date: 09/08/2001
From: thedeadoutkast
<at the finish line ceremonies, Everyone is there. mickey is getting himself some shrimp>
MICKEY: Oh wow! fried, baked, look at the...
????: hello... mickey!
<mickey turns around to find TDO>
MICKEY: HEY! You cant touch me! The race is over! You lost, i lost, and lita won!
TDO: Oh no mickey. you get the wrong idea. I never planned to win. This race was just a pleasent oppurtunity.
MICKEY: Oppurtunity for what?
TDO: Think about it, Mickey. All this race, i've been messing with space/time, countering your valiant efforts to save Steffi, kiddnapping and ransoming Ortega, AND only once did i try to take on a racer, which failed.
MICKEY: SO!?
TDO: SO THE POINT IS that i only had one objective in this race: Love.
MICKEY: Steffi...
TDO: Correct! I only wanted her love. I needed someone to hold, to share my life with.
MICKEY: But... why now?
TDO: Steffi got involved. I wanted to get her out of the race, where she'd be safe, but alas, now she's cursed to the body of an anteater...
forever...
MICKEY: You did it!
TDO: Thought you did!
MICKEY: I didnt!
TDO: Well i didnt! I wouldnt dare turn her into such an awful creature!
MICKEY: Well, if it wasnt me and wasnt you... then who?
THE END?
#542
Jet Jaguar laughs from a distance
Date: 09/08/2001
From: MickeyTheGardener
for it was he who turned Steffi into an anteater (well, maybe, I don't know. This race was so confusing)
________________MEANWHILE________________________
Mickey: Awwww....TDO, I'm sorry I said and did all those mean things. I LOVE YOU, MAN!!!! (Hugs TDO) Oh sorry, I'm so fried and baked....oh, wait you were talking about the shrimp. Hey, have you met my new friend, Waldo?
MickeyTheGardener
3rd place Wacky Racer
Time/Space expert
Waldo finder
#543
suska dee
Date: 09/08/2001
From: Tiscwslabmuz
The first mst3k I saw was the movie and I was hooked.
Tisc. W. Slabmuz
"*quack, quack, quack*"
#544
<truck nears the finish line>
Date: 09/08/2001
From: Misty_DAS_truck
Misty: Well, Wengler, ya just had to slow me down to get you in and out of the truck. This is great. Lita beat us.
Wengler: Well, I'm sorry. It's just...PM's Tubular Boobular Joy...you know.
Misty: Whatever. <they cross the finish line> Here's your damn truck. <gets out and Wengler takes the wheel. Trash appears out of nowhere and blows the truck into a jillion pieces. Misty gives him a thumbs up and goes looking for a way out of the track.>
#545
CONGA RATS LITA! CONGA RATS!!!!!11!!
Date: 09/08/2001
From: RimseysDeadlyBeeCar
Way to go! Go stand in the winners circle for a photo op!
<Lita goes into the winners circle and poses while EM stands by the caterers table eating butterfly shrimp when a hand from underneath the table grabs his leg and yanks him under. Rimmi and Evil Mike make with the smoochies while Lita is busy!>
You may have the cup but I have your man!
#546
Whoaah... whu happuh?
Date: 09/08/2001
From: PMs_Big_Rig
[PM wakes up to find himself in a booth in some kind of greasy-spoon diner. Sam and Buffalo are snoozing peacefully across from PM. PM shakes Sam awake.]
[Sam] Whu-- hey, Big Daddy! What's goin' on?
[PM] We fell asleep, that's what's going on! We need to get moving or we're gonna lose this race!
[Sam] Relax, Pharaoh-man. We have until the 8th to get to the finish line, and it's... [Checks watch. Does double-take.] *9:00 AM on the 8th?*?!?!?!
[PM] You IDIOTS! I knew we shouldn't stop for waffles at a place called "Spita and Lidey's Waffle Barn"! There was some kind of sleeping agent in those waffles! Now let's get back to the Rig so we can find out who won, anyway.
[They wake up Buffalo and go back to the Rig. They flip on the radio to hear all of the congratulations for Lita.]
[PM] Hmmmph. It figures. Oh well, I guess turnabout's fair play.
[Sam] Um, since we didn't win, are you gonna still do what you said you'd do if we didn't win?
[PM] You bet your ass I am! You losers can walk home! [Boots Sam and Buffalo out of the Rig.] Later, chumps!
[The Rig squeals it tires as it takes off.]
[Buffalo] MumblemumblegrumbleJERK!
[Sam] Hey Buffalo, buddy. You have a waffle stuck to the side of your head.
[Buffalo] Whatever, man.
TmPM
Sarcophagus!
#547
Yeeessss!!!! I can stop using
Date: 09/08/2001
From: h_wood
Warrior of the Lost World riffs in my signature now!!!
Good grief the race was fun though.
h_wood
EAT CEO
"Okay kids, but this is the _final_ sacrifice."
#548
Good party!
Date: 09/08/2001
From: Carmelita9000
<Back at EAT, the racers are milling around, drinking the punch, socializing. There are five or six Dolly Parton clones, and a few Charro Clones mingling with the guests. Lita has finally finished giving her excruciatingly long acceptance speech, much to everybody's relief. Somebody puts some CAKE music on the stereo. Lita walks over to the buffet table, and lifts up the tablecloth. Rimmer and Evil Mike are making with the smoochies underneath.>
Lita: Hey kids.
EM: Uh... Hey Lita! You found us!
Lita: Rimmy, you'd better enjoy this while you can, he's still coming home with me. I have all his stuff. Actually, stop enjoying it for a minute. I want to dance! Dance!! DANCE!!!
<Lita takes Evil Mike by the hand, and they run over to the stereo and start dancing. Before too long, most of the racers have found partners, and are dancing the day away.>
Rimmer: <still under the table> o/^ He could have waited just another minute more, before he stepped with someone else out on the floor... o/^
Critter: He slept with someone else out on the floor?!
Rimmer: Er... no.
Critter: May I have this dance?
Rimmer: Oh, I might as well. You aren't some kind of dirty draft dodger, are you?
Critter: No. NO!
<As they join the dancing, a strange man walks through EAT, tips his bowler hat at everybody, and leaves. Hmm. Odd.>
#549
WAAH!!! No one's dancing with me.
Date: 09/08/2001
From: MickeyTheGardener
Look, there's TDO dancing with the now human Steffi (apparantly, that strange man who came in to EAT was Jet Jaguar in disguise, and when he tipped his hat, Steffi became human again), Ortega (I thought I told you to get back in your damn movie) is dancing with EAT waitress Michelle's drunken dad (he thinks Ortega is Cindy Crawford) and even Waldo's got a dance partner!!! BUT WHAT ABOUT MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE???
Mickey
Ev...Misunderstood Whiner
#550
What about Michelle?
Date: 09/08/2001
From: Carmelita9000
She's dancing by herself right now, but I'm sure she wouldn't mind a partner.
<Mickey starts dancing with Michelle. She seems quite intent upon injuring her spine through dance, but otherwise seems friendly enough.>
Yay! I'm a dancing machine! Woo!
#551
Hope everyone's having a good time!
Date: 09/08/2001
From: h_wood
Hey Everybody, I finally made it back to EAT. How's the party going so far? Anybody care for a drink and a dance?
h_wood
EAT-meister
This Santa's going out the old fashioned way...
"Guns a-blazin'!"
Santa vs Martians
#552
and no one answers my question...
Date: 09/08/2001
From: thedeadoutkast
Yes, me and Steffi are together at last... Mickey dances with his sweet contesa... We all have the time of our life at this little "Eat" in the middle of the desert. This has beena good race.
But, no one seems to answer my question...
NOW WHAT!?
#553
I'm the first one to post the next day!!
Date: 09/09/2001
From: Caveys_sidehacker
Whooo Hooo! Congrats Lita, you played well! I guess cheating works for some people. Hey, get your spider away from me. Ahhhhhhh!!!! Run PumyMonkey!!!!!
//thumb
Cavewoman
#554
Personal Question:
Date: 09/09/2001
From: h_wood
Feel free not to answer if it seems _too_ personal, or if this is waaaaaaaaaay outside the bounds of board etiquite. If that is the case let me know, and I shan't mention it again.
How did everyone come up with their handles?
Some of them are pretty obviously MST3K inspired, but what about the rest?
Personally, mine is an off-shoot of a college nickname. My name is Alan, and for as long as I can recall people have been calling me Al & the obvious off-shoots thereof. One of those off-shoots developed in college, when some guys I knew started calling me "Hollywood Al." I never really got a decent answer as to why, but the name kind of stuck. Recently I was on a business trip, and the nickname came up in conversation. The people I was with shortened it up to H-Wood, and that's what I've been using since. That's about it!
h_wood
Mr. EAT
"According to Erma Bombeck _all_ teenagers are from outer space."
#555
My name ... THE DEAD OUTKAST!
Date: 09/09/2001
From: thedeadoutkast
It basically started with a wrestling charecter. On WWF smackdown (the videogame) i liked to create different charecters. In fact, it was really the ability to create charecters that got me into wrestling.
one day, i made a charecter called Paria (an offshoot of Pariah, which mean outkast.) I gave him blue hair (which explains why i keep mentioning blue hair references) and made him fierce.
As time went on, i also was going through a hard time in my life. After someone tore up my $300 trenchcoat (and yes, i did have one) i was pissed. Then, this little shit known as nick H, (thats what we'll call him) began to crack jokes at my expense. This was a normal occurance. Then, i just finally lost it and beat the crap out of a trash can. Seeing him laugh just drove me INSANE!! And the fact that the people who i thought were my friends didnt do anthing to stop this Nick H just really made me angry inside. They didnt help me find the person responsible, they didnt tell nick to stop, they didnt even come with me when i stormed off...
So, from that day foward, i became Paria, also known as the dead outkast. My mind was never normal after that. I simply roamed the schoolyards... looking for fights. No where to run, nowhere to hide. I was the outkast.
Soon before the insanity, i ran into MST3K. It was now the only thing i had. It added order to my chaos. TDO soon became my alter ego...
<PS: i know ive basically said this before, but i said it again since you asked>
outkast for life
#556
My handle comes from the show Red Dwarf.
Date: 09/10/2001
From: A_Judas_Rimmer
There's a character on the show named Arnold Judas Rimmer.
And now for something completely different....
*I blame Nelly Olsen for this!
What movie does that riff come from?
#557
[Pulls up to Eat...]
Date: 09/10/2001
From: PMs_Big_Rig
[...and is marginally surprised to still find people there! PM pulls out a remote control, pushes a button, and his wife teleports in! Fortunately for him, she's properly dressed and ready to party! They cut it up on the dance floor!]
TmPM
Sarcophagus!
P.S. My handle comes from a game called "Torg: Roleplaying the Possibility Wars". In that game, the earth was invaded by (initially) six different alternate realities which were bent on conquering it and stealing its possibilities. Pharaoh Mobius was the evil High Lord of the Nile Empire (the Pulp reality), which was more or less what you'd get if you crossed Indiana Jones, Doc Savage, threw in a little Flash Gordon, and gave it a strong Egyptian flavor. You know, basically take the typical Pulp storyline from the thirties and replace the Nazis with Egyptians, and you've pretty much got the idea. The Nile was one of the more fun realms to play in, so I co-opted the handle Pharaoh Mobius when I became active online. End of long-winded explaination.
Tragedy strikes
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